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Tuesday, September 23, 2008

hmm...

Last night Ryan and I were praying over our new friend Aaron. We were all three standing outside, at night, in a parking lot, under a tree.

We had our eyes closed for quite a while and when we finished and looked up, Ryan had a PRAYING MANTIS on his NECK. This thing was the length of my middle finger.

For serious.

Ryan was completely unaware of this and started talking vibrantly about how excited he was to see God’s work in Aaron’s life and what a great time of prayer we just had. I was the first to notice the beastly insect about to kill my friend, so naturally I say in a very seriously low voice “Ryan…don’t move” as I walk toward him with my nalgene raised above my head and the look of death in my eye.

Ryan had an amazing expression on his face because he had NO IDEA what was going on. I wish I could describe it.

I knocked the evil spindly creature off his head with no injury to his cranium.

SUCCESS!!

Then Aaron and I explained to Ryan what happened, and he proceeded to freak out and run away from his spot under the tree after I had already taken care of the problem.
Hellooooo…

Ryan ripped off his hoodie and insisted on finding the praying mantis. Then he got all worried because he couldn’t find the praying mantis. Such a boy thing to do, I say. It’s over. I saved your life. Let’s go home.

And then…I feel a tingling sensation on my neck.

“Guys….is there something--?”

I couldn’t even finish before those two boys screamed like little girls and ran away from me.

They ran away from me!

Of course it’s the evil praying mantis, on MY NECK this time and I had to SAVE MYSELF because the boys ran away! I knocked the little devil off my hair and this time we found him and glared at him on the concrete for a while and dared him to jump on us again.
Then Ryan doubled over and laughed harder than I’ve ever seen him laugh.

“It was a praying mantis…while we were praying…”

The irony.

4 comments:

  1. THAT. is disgusting.

    but you tell the story so well that it is entertaining! i would srsly pee my pants if one of those things was on me. on your NECK of all places?! after you already annihilated it with a nalgene? freakiest.

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  2. bethany! what a terrific story! narrated perfectly! perfectly, i tell you!

    very, very priceless. you just made my morning, friend.

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  3. That is so funny! Thanks for sharing. :-)

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